Question with 9 notes
Anonymous asked: Should I just tell people I'm an introvert so they csn understand why I am so awkward?
While I would no recommend having an introduction like “Hi, my name is Bob and I am an introvert, I am also painfully awkward, please hang out with me”, I would recommend telling your friends you need alone time to recharge.
Also, being awkward is not an introvert thing. Extroverts and Introverts can be awkward, it just means you need to work on those social skills. It sucks, but you have to make an effort to go out, socialize, start to notice what works and what doesn’t, and smooth the edges off the awkward. I can’t say it will go away entirely or that it won’t be exhausting, but it will make socializing less awkward for all and eventually easier.
Harsh Truth End Note: Not very many people will care what your excuse for being awkward is unless they get to know you and you become friends. The average person on the street cares very little about your problems or why you have them.
Question with 6 notes
Anonymous asked: So, I'm an introvert, and I have a lot of friends but they never ask me to hang out. I've been told I should just ask them to hang out, but the problem is i like being alone, so I dont even know if I wanna ask them.. But I feel like I have to or I won't be considered "socially acceptable" if I never hang out with people
You should ask them to hang out with you at least a bit, and as friendship is a two way street, you might be giving off the impression you don’t like them that much, or they may be as introverted as you. I don’t know your friends.
Not hanging out with people ever is definitely outside the norm. While I am not sure about how socially acceptable it, I do know that two groups of people do it a lot; extreme introverts and unhappy people. If someone expresses concern because you never hang out with people, they are probably wondering if you are depressed and need help.
Anyway, i would do what makes you happy. Personally, I think hanging out with your friends is fun, especially if they are the ones that you don’t have to talk to the whole time you are hanging out and can have movie marathons with, but if hanging out with them at school/work is enough, stick with that.
Based on your first comment, though, it seems like you wish your friends would ask you to hang out, so I would recommend treating them like you wish they treated you and going from there. If you wish your friends would ask you hang out, ask them to hang out with you, if you with your friends would leave you alone, leave them alone.
Question with 8 notes
Anonymous asked: What do you do when you like someone but they like someone else and you're too scared to tell the person how you feel about them?
Either get up the courage to tell them and rick rejection or sit around feeling scared knowing that there is a good chance nothing will happen and they might be as scared as you.
Pick which one you feel is the lesser of the two evils.
There is no ‘snap your fingers and you are magically already in a comfortable, committed relationship’ option.
Question with 2 notes
goldenphoenix97 asked: Please help me, my family want me to change to socialize more and we all know what we feel about socializing. I dont want to change and i cant change who i am. All my life i hid with my mask to avoid conflicts but i cant hide forever, im tired. Help
So not all socializing is bad, especially if it is with someone you like being around.
I mainly hung out with one person in in high school even though my mom encouraged me to make more friends because she was awesome and fulfilled all my social needs.
If you are not socializing at all, that would worry your parents. Humans (I am assuming you are human here) are social creatures and need social interaction to be happy. The amount varies from person to person, but for 99.99999% of people, it is more than none.
If you have a few close friends and don’t socialize much, I would try to explain to your parents that you prefer quality over quantity, treasure the friends you have, and don’t feel the need to see them every day or have any more.
Hopefully your parents will understand and if they don’t know that most parents are coming from a place of love and want the best for you, so their intentions are good. Hopefully you guys will reach an understanding, or you will be able to move out before you try and kill each other.
Question with 4 notes
Anonymous asked: I will be leaving for college in a year or so and im an introvert as well as shy. Any tips to help me out?
Um, well, it is going to be awkward and uncomfortable at time, so just accept that right off the bat.
But I would definitely make an effort whether it is to talk to the people in your dorm or join a club and smile. At first almost everyone is in the same boat, they want to make new friends and don’t know many people, and it is one of the easiest times to meet lots of people, talk to them, and figure out the ones you want to be friends with.
It will be kinda exhausting until you have your friends figured out and know them well, but the effort of putting yourself out there and getting to know people is worth it.
Also, good luck with your roommate. If your roommate is an extrovert you may have to find your own places on campus to get alone time (I recommend the library). You will do a lot of growing up for the better.
… . . I have done this.
Being a introvert is like being Robert Downey Jr. in your head
and Castiel in real life
how did you manage to sum it up so easily
Post with 13 notes
Honestly, I ‘m quiet confued with what my situation is. My whole life I was always so bubbly and exited to be social. I’d talk to anyone about anything at any given moment and enjoy it. Pretty extroverted in a sense, but a year ago I came to a point in my life where I isolated myself from people for a few months, no physical contact with anyone other than my family and my bestfriend (ocasionally I’d hang out with 2 other people but that haulted after a while) so I found myself growing paranoid.. Kind of in a state of psycosis as well, still recovering. I was also placed under severe depression and developed anixety.. Well, after that I found it really hard to talk to anyone, I got really nervous and the thoughts that ran through my head about myself kept me from saying anything. I convinced myself that everyone hated me or found me awkward or annoying and that I was better left alone.. So now I find myself wanting to be alone and finding comfort in being isolated for some periods of time. Under certain situations, like when I smoke pot around people, I get really bad anxiety.. I start to shake and negative thoughts run through my head, but I can go out and be soial when I have to be and live a normal life, I just prefer my own company over others. I seem to be leaning more toward the introverted trait than extrovert.. Is it possible for your personality to switch due to certain situations? Or just in different periods of your life? I know its possible to be both intro/extro but I never really understood how a personality could just flop?
IC: Hi! Thank you for your message, this is actually really interesting and I have seen a lot of similar situations. Just recently I was working with a girl who described herself as an introvert but was loud and social and outgoing and loved people. At the time a few friends and I were like, yeah okay introvert sure, but now that I’ve thought about it, it makes sense. Being an introvert doesn’t mean you don’t like people, it means you need more ‘me’ time than extroverts. Introverts thrive on one-on-one or close situations/relationships whereas extroverts thrive in large groups with lots of people. You can enjoy people and be excited and have fun and still need time away to recharge, it’s very possible that you have always been an introvert, but your recent depression/anxiety has pulled you away from your need/want of being social and exacerbated your introversion.
I can relate in that sense, as I have just been diagnosed with major depression and anxiety and have started medications for it. I did not realize how much of my social life was depleted until the medications started kicking in and I was able to hold conversations and speak up and give my opinions without being absolutely terrified. Suddenly I remember how to enjoy others company, how to make friends, how to open up to other people, etc.. Whereas before I thought I was fine with my 3 friends and avoiding all people all the time with a permanent bitch face.
Ultimately, every person is different. We have labels and boxes for everything, but the world is hardly so neat. Just do whatever makes you happy and if sometimes that means alone time then alone time it is.
If you are able, I would suggest getting help for your depression/anxiety and avoid recreational drugs that make the negative feelings worse. It sucks, I know it all sucks and it’s very hard to deal with, but life continues on and depression is that needy friend who holds you back from your potential because they’re too scared. Sometimes you have to let those friends go in order to realize that they were never actually your friends in the first place and that they were only hurting you.
Hope this kind of answered your question!
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